My Smart Fridge Tried to Sell My Data and I Had to Pull the Plug (Literally)
I made a mistake. I bought a smart fridge.
In my defense, it was on sale, and it had a little screen on it that showed the weather. I am, apparently, the exact demographic for this kind of psychological warfare.
The first week was great. I could see the forecast while getting milk. I felt like I lived in the future. I sent my girlfriend a photo of the screen with the caption “we are living in 3025.” She replied with a thumbs up emoji. She was clearly as excited as I was.
Then the betrayal began.
The Inciting Incident
I woke up one morning to an email: “Your LG refrigerator has a new software update!”
I didn’t install it. I don’t trust updates from a company that makes appliances AND also makes you watch ads on your refrigerator door.
The next day, the screen started showing me ads. For a pizza place. While I was standing in front of my fridge. Looking at the food I already have.
You know who doesn’t show me ads? My dumb fridge from 1998 that just had a freezer on top and minded its own business.
The Escalation
I checked the network traffic. You know what I found? My fridge was talking to seven different analytics endpoints. Seven. My fridge had a more sophisticated data pipeline than some startups I’ve consulted for.
It was reporting:
- How often I open the door
- What time of day I’m most fridge-active
- The ambient temperature of my kitchen (why??)
- How long the door stays open (judging me for standing there contemplating my life choices at 2 AM)
I WFH’d the fridge. I put it on its own VLAN with no internet access. It can talk to my Home Assistant and thats it. Freedom isn’t free. Sometimes it costs your refrigerator’s civil liberties.
Where We Are Now
The fridge still works. It just cant snitch on me anymore. The screen shows a static image of a cat that I loaded from a local server. Sometimes I change the cat. That’s all the “smart” functionality I need.
My girlfriend says I have a problem. I say I have a segmented network with strict ACLs and she’s just not technical enough to appreciate it.
Moral of the story: The Internet of Things is just an Internet of Snitches. VLAN your refrigerator before it’s too late.